Thursday, November 02, 2006

i totally canNOT believe i have just donated like dunno how many hours of my life to the watching of a serial show. and i canNOT believe that some part of me does not regret it.. not all of me, but enough to wonder if my sanity is at risk.. i tell myself: this is retarded, girl. what on earth is so interesting about the completely absurd and out-of-this-world love life of this bunch of people running around chasing each other in circles.. well, not literally lah.. but does this "telling myself" work? heh, i guess not.. i mean, look at me.. still blinking my eyes from the extended glare of the television screen.. but oh well, to the person who pampers me at her house: it was fun!
sigh sigh sigh. you know what, as if its any surprise but, ive decided that 70 books by the end of the years is simply not gonna work. as i have proven time and again, i seem to be highly incapable of sticking to a task for extended periods of time.. i need a.. nagger.. and even then... hehehe need i say more? oh wells anyways, i realised that tempting as it may seem, living my life in a fantasy world where everything is generally as i would like it to be (well, i dont get to choose the story in the book, but i do get to choose the book dont i?) for the better part of the holidays is only gonna result in me getting a huge culture shock at the start of the next school year.. and well, (as my parents would not-so-gently remind me) that i would start the year still behind.. *pouts* oh what would the younger me say.. if i brought back the primary school, or even secondary school me back to life, id say i would have to be sorely disappointed at what ive turned out to be.. little kids, being kids, have the ability to dream.. being on this earth for a shorter time, they are still filled with the illusion that anything is possible and that things will somehow turn out for the better no matter how bad they might seem at the moment.. oh, the happy days of childhood bliss.. sigh.. i guess we all sorta.. "grew up". the seven year old me would be mortified at my lack of concern for the things going on in school.. the slightly older me would be thinking im crazy.. oh come on, youre giving up reading for.. for.. this so-called attempting to study?! the not-so-long-ago me would be wondering in dismay at me at me not caring about my friends as much.. well, i mean, if you have a problem and you need help with it, sure, id be more than happy to help.. but i guess ive stopped making other peoples problems mine and thats that. its too tiring.. anyways, i guess in a way those opinions are all valid.. its really nice to feel the cool air blowing past you skating round and round on the rink.. and to feel the wind in your hair while on the swing.. it makes me feel young again.. did i tell you they just installed swings and a new playground in my condo? i could almost imagine myself away to this faraway plantation or something where there are trees allover and life slows to a crawl.. the plantation part i can imagine.. on one side of the playground is part of the bukit timah forest (i think, haha!) but the carefree life a bit hard lah.. the rubbered floor beneath my feet is reminder enough that even childs play has been finetuned to a science.. *grumbles* oh wells anyways, come on over everyone and play on my new playground, though its still under construction, sorta.. we can always climb under the stuff they put up to keep people out.. (dunno what to call it.. fencing? netting? :/)
AND BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I STILL WANNA GO WWW! *POUTS*
oh wells i guess its time to shut myself up.. i just dont wanna stick my head full of chinese stuff.. even if it is for the last time.. (hopefully. )

Bonjour. Si vous voulons me chercher, vous êtes venu au faux endroit.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

9:30 pm

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