Bonjour. Si vous voulons me chercher, vous ĂȘtes venu au faux endroit.
Saturday, December 30, 2006
i wanted to start by saying "oh my gosh i am baaack" but then rachel wang the [insert unmentionable name] insisted that that sounded like i came back from goodness knows where, and i havent been back for dunno how many years like that.. so i decided that i should start off by complaining about her.. yeah. you know, i never realised the full potential of her insanity until i was forced to be stuck sharing hotel rooms with her, and seeing her face every single hour for 10 days straight.. from now on, i resolve to stay a 1 metre radius away from her at all times.. i suggest you should too, for your own safety.. im afraid though, that one metre is not very helpful when she is unleashing her deadliest weapon--the irritating earworm.. the music for tjcs 2005 syf dance has been stuck in my head. very successfully. anyways, the trip was rather interesting.. for the first couple of days. the rest of it was just plain old slacking around.. which of course could have and probably would have been done if i had simply stayed in singapore.. right now, my brains are mush because after a while, there was absolutely nothing to give those rusty brain cells a good jolt.. this year mellowed my dad some, i think.. usually he rushes us around seeing loads of stuff which wed never see otherwise, trying to fit as many things into the itenery as possible.. but apart from the first couple of days, we did.... nothing. yes, literally.. but its a nice place lah.. the mountain/hill areas are really really beatiful, and the weather was perfect.. well, almost. nothings ever perfect, but anyways.. i tell you, you must be a real kickass driver to be able to drive in vietnam.. which my dad is, by the way.. did you know, when we went to europe, where the drivings done on the right, we just rented a car and he drove straight out to the highway just like that.. of course at that time i was too young to realise what a feat that was.. i probably was i dunno, sleeping or something.. but anyways, vietnam is the land of the motorbikes.. everywhere you go, there are hordes of them.. and the way they drive, they might as well not have lane markings.. oh but jaywalking is easy though, they expect you to jaywalk.. not like here in singapore.. but anyways, never was i gladder to see singapore airport and its efficiency and cleanliness and whatever else it has won awards for.. oh yes, i am super happy to be home.. my bed misses me as much as i miss it, im sure.. oh yeah, merry belated christmas and a happy new year.. feels wierd having christmas without christmas dinner though.. feels like somethings missing, even though we had a substitute lunch.. i got dragged along to mass on christmas eve, which i failed to see the point of.. it was all in vietnamese.. none of us could understand a thing.. but it was well, christmas.. and we were on holiday, i didnt want to spoil the mood.. so yeah.. but the hymns were nice though.. they made me feel all warm and loved and be-good-to-your-neighbour-ish, never mind the foreign sound.. oh anyways, i tell you, i learned some vietnamese, wanna hear? its really singsong and sounds kinda like cantonese.. da chanh is like the specialty drink of vietnam.. its this lime juice thing with lots of sugar.. and thank you sounds like come on spoken funny.. nam is male and nu is female (from the toilet signs haha).. and cafe ser da is coffee milk ice, translated literally.. and and and i think thats about all.. *grins sheepishly*
11:06 pm
Thursday, December 21, 2006
yeah flying off tomorrow, trying to look real busy so that i wont be called up to perform some task or other which takes my mothers fancy.. not very good at that though.. i havent really mastered the art of being invisible yet.. anybody got pointers, please feel free to share.. i dont see why they must hurry me so, theres still quite a bit of time.. but ive packed already so well no complaints there.. i like leaving things to the last minute.. rushing to meet deadlines or well more often than not, rushing to be on time gives a burst of adrenaline which motivates me more than long-term planning does.. i love buses.. the way they allow you hundreds of options to choose from, whether youre late or not depends on a combination of both luck and skill.. you have to like know the probability of the arrival of the various buses and the in-bus times, but whether the buses come within a certain time can make or break the whole thing.. and then theres the whole proportioning out of the journey.. if the bus amazingly gets through here, youll have 5 minutes from here to here, 10 minutes from there to there, then 5 mins to grab everything then run.. if the bus gets held up then theres 4 mins, 8 mins, then 3 mins sprint.. or even worse, total journey time 10 mins (probably impossible), and an all-out crazy sprint sprint.. i rarely do those crazy sprints these days.. my muscles are feeling lazy and left-out.. my calf muscles feel like they really need to be stretched and my ankles feel kinda wierd.. oh did i tell you last time when i was still a dumb dumb kid of seven years, and i was still learning ballet.. there was this time when i sprained my ankle because i listened to the other childrens advice that standing up on the see saw made it all the more fun.. i didnt even last five seconds.. yeah, some more after that got some race through macritchie reservoir which i get left behind cos i couldnt walk properly haha.. and you know what.. that day, the ballet teacher said i danced (or rather, tried to dance) really well.. oh how retarded that was.. but she wasnt really a nice person so oh well.. so anyways.. today i saw this young boy running for the bus i was on.. i think he missed it and was attempting to make it for the next bus stop.. well, didnt look like he would make it, from the way he was running.. and plus the next bus stop was further than usual.. yeah so he stopped and gave up when he saw me looking.. oh wells, even if you cant make it youll never know unless you give it your 110% right.. your mitochondria are simply dying for an adventure.. anyways, another reason why i love buses is the flexibility that buses give. there are always alternative routes for you to take, provided you know your buses well enough.. mrt.. once you commit to this way, you gotta follow through.. its so predictable it leaves nothing to the imagination.. oh yes, and besides, i live in between mrt stations, which makes me not far from any.. but not near to any either.. yes another reason.. i love the windows.. you can stare at people, and in a couple of seconds, youre past.. majority of those being stared-at wont even notice theyre being stared at.. cool huh.. in the mrt, the only people who arent too small to be properly observed at those on the train.. but then, theyll think its kinda rude right.. anyways.. i was on the bus and i saw this person at the bus stop who i guess stares (okay fine, looks) at people too.. we kinda stared at each other for a while, until the bus started to move off.. i looked away first, since i was in such a good mood, feeling all christmas-carolly and all.. did you know that the word noel actually kinda equals carol? i never knew that (okay yes i am a dumb dumb after all).. i always thought it meant like a person or something.. i guess i wasnt really paying attention to what ive been singing all these years.. bad girl.. haha anyways, dunno why this years christmas feels different somehow.. hmm what was i doing last year.. i think i probably was err sulking or something.. oh nono i remember now.. i was working at the book expo thing and i was hoping that by the time i reached back the whole christmas dinner party thing would be over.. but it wasnt, much to my disappointment.. yeah so then the whole hello merry christmas how are you what are you doing now thing took place, with me wishing that id already perfected the skill of being invisible.. as you can probably tell, one year on hasnt improved that area of expertise very much.. haha this is great ive actually bought myself half an hour trying to look like im part of the background.. my mum (thankfully) has been attracted to the box we call a tv.. even though im pretty sure theres nothing much in the way of watching.. speaking of watching stuff, theres a list of movies i wanna catch, but dont have the time and money to.. btw did i tell you i like making lists? and plans (preferably not written out.. writing it out slows down the thinking process)? but im just very very bad at following through with them.. it kinda helps you slot the right things in the right places in your brain.. okay so.. not necessarily in this order.. 1) eragon 2) turning pages 3) water 4) curse of the red [something] there.. hope i didnt miss anything out.. and speaking of slotting stuff around in my brain.. i dont like it when im trying to pack my room and somebody sees the huge mess and well, im sure very well-meaningly, packs it all up to look all neat and tidy.. or i leave stuff somewhere and somebody keeps it back in place.. its very frustrating.. i love it when i have these like huge piles of stuff.. and when i dig for something, i have this idea of where it is (degree of vagueness varies).. and its like i have this feeling of it being between this kind of stuff and that kind of stuff.. and when i actually find it, and i look at the place i found it, i can understand what the past me was thinking when i stuffed the thing there.. its very logical, really. there is always order in chaos.. it is only us who cant find the order.. oh but the thing is, i sometimes dont really pay very much attention to where i put some of the things.. depending on how important i feel the thing has, the deeper/lesser the impression of where i left it.. so some things i cant remember for the life of me where they are.. i didnt think that id be really needing that.. and so, those are the unfortunate things which get lost.. okay lemme list the things i need to say goodbye to before i leave.. my good old friend mister piano.. he can be really stubborn, well i guess i can be too, so that makes two.. yeah, heres the kind of friend who will still remain your friend even though youre waging a cold war with him, or for the time being found something else more interesting to take up your time.. and this very computer, another good ol' reliable one.. if my sources are correct, ive known it for seven or eight years.. and still plodding on dutifully.. not bad, huh.. not exactly the fastest anymore, but well one couldnt ask for more.. and of course my dearest bed.. some crazy stuff youve brought me through, some nights.. and still as comfortable as ever.. oh yes speaking of sleeping.. last week i couldnt sleep properly cos i was trying a sleeping experiment which i kinda abandoned.. i wanted my sleep more heh.. i was trying to find which kind of music puts me to sleep the best, be it deepest sleep or fastest sleeping time.. i think the deepest sleep has to go to george crumb, yeah and i think the most dreamless to.. although im sure i did dream but i just cant remember what for the life of me.. and the fastest would have to go to the weird stuff that people my age (apparently) listen to nowadays.. the way to go about sleeping in this is to start to take it apart into different bands of sound, and before i know it, im waking up and its the next day.. either that, or its just plain silence and the sound of the crickets.. this works only when im not actually thinking whether im falling asleep or not though.. but i tell you, the worst worst worst was tchaikovsky.. dont ever try that.. i thought it might send me off with little dancing figures or something, but oh my gosh i took so super long getting to sleep, and even then i dont even know if it qualifies as sleeping.. i was still awake at FOUR.. and couldnt get back to sleep after that.. yeah, so if you know what stuff puts people to sleep, tell me horh.. i wanna know/try too.. hmm, i think i should say goodbye to the plants too.. last time i used to talk to them whenever i was free.. i tell you ah, before i started jc i told myself i must do bio H3 ah.. you know why.. cos i thought that H3 they let you do whatever research you wanted, and haha guess what i wanted to do.. i wanted to like study the effect of talking on plants.. like the length of talking, the subjects, the volume, whether or not its a real person or just a recording or simulation, the number of plants being talked to etc. etc. and talking really does work okay.. you know right in secondary school we had this experiment on the intensity of light vs. rate of photosynthesis.. me and shyna were partners, and we were singing the counting crows song which goes like come on, come on blah blah blah which was kinda popular at that time because of shrek.. and guess what.. the rate of photosynthesis of our hydrilla (measured by no. of air bubbles) was triple that of any other hydrillas.. not bad huh.. of course, it was a very ameteur experiment, but oh wells.. i wanted to bring it home to keep as a err, pet (?) or something.. but then it got passed around and got lost or something.. poor it.. im sure it died shortly after.. yeah, so say goodbye to plants.. anyways, i think ive stayed invisible for long enough.. plus my fingers have had enough exercise for one day.. going to stone around or sth..
11:10 pm
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
my sister asked: did you miss me? well, if you count a feeling of wierdness when theres nobody to shoo me off the computer, the abscence of the tap-tap-tap of the keyboard and the occasional spurts of laughter to fall asleep to, nobody to disturb me when i disturb her (wait, wasnt it the other way around?) and nobody to tempt with my chicken nuggets or maggi mee or whatever there is for the eating in the middle of the night.. yeah i guess i did miss her.. but now shes back, irritatingness and all:) so anyway, ive been such a good girl recently i myself wouldnt believe myself.. out of the list of three people(s) i managed to kinda like fulfilled one.. and more! i spent the day with my grandmother and well, in a way, it felt sorta nice.. and here i am, getting all sentimental when a few days ago i was reading the mitch albom thingy in the papers and snorting in laughter.. yeah hes such an overly sentimental guy.. get a life man, and face reality.. ps. did you know theres a moonbeam walk in singapore? its such a pretty name! i wanna stay somewhere like that one day..
11:48 pm
Monday, December 18, 2006
one
Today was my first day at my new school. It was a total disaster. There was orientation, where presumably you orientate yourself to the new environment where you are going to spend your next two years. But there was so much screaming, too much noise, so many new people, too many new places, it was impossible to orientate myself to anything. I don't see why they make such a big fuss of this, running around the compound doing stupid things. The whole time I was there I wished I was at home studying or expanding my leaf collection. The worst was the game 'whacko', where you have to call the name of people so that you don't get whacked. I couldn't tell what they were saying, it was so noisy. I tried asking whose name they just called out, but nobody seemed to like that. I don't see why not. I'm just trying to play the game. It got even worse when I got whacked and had to go to the centre and try to hit people. I couldn't tell what their voices were saying, and even if I could, I knew I was going to have a lot of trouble knowing who to go after. So I stared at the floor wondering what to do. People started coming round and asking things, I'm not quite sure what. And touching me, hugging me and patting me on the back. It was very, very uncomfortable. I didn't know what to do. I didn't mean to offend anybody, really. Especially not on my first day there. I'm not really sure what happened straight after that, it's all a bit blurry somehow. Only that I tried really hard to make myself invisible while trying to concentrate on the floor. And now I'm home. I guess I'll go to sleep tonight comforting myself with this story I found on the internet one day. I hope I sleep well though,I'm exhausted from all the big to-do.
The Square Hole A square peg, living in a world where all the pegs are round felt out of place in every place where rounded pegs abound.They filed away his angles, smoothed every edge; they made of him an ordinary, smoothly rounded peg. One day they saw a wondrous sight that terrified each soul for there before their eyes was an incredible SQUARE HOLE!! The pegs were all confused and lost; one wept on the floor. For nowhere in the world were square pegs any more.
10:41 pm
Sunday, December 17, 2006
well here i am, very much still alive.. it seems sometimes things seem worse than they actually are but oh well anyway. the other day i was coming home, got on the bus, sat down as usual though not in my favourite seat.. and this guy opposite me gave me a little smile.. just a small upwards turn of the mouth, but the smile was in the eyes, and boy what a smile it was. it was the smile of somebody all too accustomed to the quick glance and lookaway of singaporeans, knowing thatll probably be all one could expect but still smiling anyway.. he had this little girl who was super cute.. she dropped her bottle near my feet and when she said sorry she even shook my hand.. hmm i tell you i prefer kids to older people.. or even people remotely near the same age as me.. children have this unassumingness about them.. and they dont expect much of you, taking all your oddities as well, not abnormalties but i dunno, as if its what theyve been expecting all along.. i guess thats the trouble with growing up.. the more you see of this world, the habit of the human intellect becomes more apparent.. our need for order in chaos, and the need to categorize spills over into how we see each other and well, so on.. but anyways, that totally made my day.. i practically skipped up the stairs leading to my house.. okay maybe not skipped, dashed or ran is a bit more realisitic.. i even managed a smile and a sort of half-wave from the bus stop to the guy and his kid, which on hindsight must have looked pretty retarded.. oh well, now you know how to make my day.. today we had this family lunch thingy which was sort of a pre-christmas kind of thing.. and since well i decided that i had better try to play the part of the dutiful daughter and all so that my parents wouldnt be forced to come up with some lame excuse explaining my abscence, i went along.. altogether not too painful, could have been worse i guess.. but i decided that i should be nicer to a few of my relatives.. 1) auntie claudine.. the really nice one who always wraps the christmas presents nicely and well, with some effort put in.. and who actually puts some thought into what gifts to get.. but the problem is, shes kind of always busy working as some beautician something-or-other.. so, yeah well.. 2) auntie josephine, the youngest daughter of my mums family.. shes a housewife, no correction, homemaker.. and feel kind of bad for her cos shes kind of lonely at home with her two kids for company the whole day.. her husband is a jap chef, how cool is that.. well, but not so cool for her though.. cooking must be up to standard.. yeah i feel like i should visit or something.. especially since i taught her daughter one of these last hols and we kinda talked a bit.. yeah.. 3) my grandparents.. at the end when the other cousins left and there was just me and isabelle they were talking, no correction, clamouring to talk.. did you know that im the like the great-great-granddaughter of choo joo chiat, the person whom joo chiat road was named after..? pretty cool huh.. i didnt know which was sadder, them or me pretending that it was the most interesting conversation ive ever had in my life.. yeah, especially when a couple of days ago my grandmother was saying how i only went to visit when i forgot to bring along my house keys.. boo boo, me. yeh, so visit and sit around and talk sometime soon.. heh must be the whole christmas season thing, getting me in such a rambling mood.. can you believe it ive got carols humming themselves around my head even when nothing is playing.. stupid commercialization of christmas and all, everywhere i go i hear them..
9:59 pm
Thursday, December 14, 2006
i am mince meat.. or rather, about to be mince meat.. or maybe even worse.. about to be pureed and the feeling is horrigible, especially when im still trying to decide the best way to deliver myself up to the slaughter house.. i am so dead.
lots of love, from the bottom of my frozen in the freezer heart.
10:03 am
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
eragon opens today! i wasnt planning on catching it, or even reading the book.. it looks kinda lame.. sort of like a LOTR spinoff.. i mean, couldnt they have had just a tiny leetle bit of creativity in the name choosing.. when i first saw it i was like.. eragon=aragorn?!?!? im a real sucker for tongue-excericising, exotic-sounding names.. and the use of the letter Y is always a plus.. but then, bet you didnt know this, but the author was only sixteen when he wrote it.. and that kinda almost makes it forgivable.. hey, thats younger than i am! maybe the plot will be a mishmash of other plots, and maybe it really will be kinda lame haha.. but i guess im reading this afterall.. anybody wanna donate to the let-gail-watch-eragon fund? the other day i was on my way for my piano lesson when i realised that i wore my shirt inside out.. (LOL yes i know) i tend to do stuff like this once in a while.. the other time i was being asked why i was so sloppy when we realised that i buttoned my shirt wrongly.. it would have been really comical if it wasnt happening to me.. but thats another story for another time.. so please, if you happen to notice that im a walking fashion disaster or anything, do tell me.. anyways. i had to go look for a toilet at the hawker centre thingy and the toilet was just uhhh, no comment.. not that it was really really dirty or anything.. but i just felt this need to touch everything with only the very tips of my fingers.. which by the way, were positively screaming.. and yes, in case youre wondering whats happened to my bag Hi-Ke, he/she/it currently is currently taking a break while in the wash.. i tried balancing it on this ledge thing, but it fell on the floor instead.. poor he/she/it.. anyways, sometimes i wonder if im only singaporean by name.. going to places that people go to every single day, i feel more like a tourist than a local.. coffee shops and hawker centres have this foreign feel somehow.. like i dont belong there.. even bus interchanges have this feeling of vague unfamiliarity.. i was walking around little india the other day, breathing in the heady scent of the burning inscence (how do you spell that?), just watching people going about their day-to-day living, it was all kinda mildly interesting in a really abstract tourist-ish kinda way.. i mean like wow they still have all of this in singapore? unbelievable! the garlands of flowers, the warehouse-looking shophouses which seem to belong to a different era, the handmade noodles, the unhurried stroll of the passers-by, the garble of english mixed with other languages, and etc. etc. oh there was one thing i could identify with though.. the blatent jaywalking.
12:39 pm
Saturday, December 09, 2006
announcements announcements! number one. the acjc string ensemble will be playing for the chinese theatre circle's chinese opera next january.. apparently, its the first full-length chinese opera in english, and played by Western instruments.. i always wondered about these firsts.. how do you know youre really the first? for all you know theres some really small, little-known one someplace else far far away.. there isnt an inventory of all the concerts in the world right? or is there...?anyways, lets just assume it really is the first.. and well, even if it isnt, thats not an excuse for you to miss it.. ive only heard the strings parts of it and i imagine itll sound rather interesting when put together with the winds and percussion.. i dont usually start advertising for stuff this early, but its sounding quite cool so you better get your ticket haha! its on the 26th, if im not wrong.. and at the drama centre, also if im not wrong.. cos i cant find the yellow paper which tells me the synopsis of the story and where and when and all that stuff.. anyways, i noticed that tan kang ming has been saying "good" alot.. either number one, we really are getting alot better.. number two, he just wants to encourage us.. number three, he expects so little of us that any small step seems like a large leap.. or number four. i simply wasnt paying attention to what he said in the past.. and dont ask me why i call our conductor tkm.. it just registers faster in my brain somehow.. if you say "mr tan", ill take two seconds to make the connection.. ps. dont tell him, but i think he does look rather dashing (from a distance) when he wears whatever it is that he wears during sso concerts hahaha.. shhh! number two. for neopets lovers, you probably already know this but... *drumroll* the Advent Calendar is back! :) *grins grins* for those who dont already know, the advent calendar is only operational during the month leading up to christmas, and its where you get free "limited edition" stuff and free neopoints.. thats certainly something to celebrate about, isnt it? speaking of christmas.. christmas arrives really early in singapore.. first it starts with the orchard road lightup and all the early deco at all the major malls.. then you start hearing the good ol' christmas carols.. and then, believe it or not, my mum has already wrapped most of my relatives christmas gifts.. (psst. so has my grandmother!) meh, im officially in the broke status, so dont get your hopes up on getting a christmas present from me.. anyways. i think maybe giving presents during christmas has kinda lost its meaning for my mum.. it has become an obligation.. i was helping to do the wrapping and my sister was complaining about how slowly i was wrapping.. for every one i wrapped, she wrapped three or four.. hey i dont normally do present-wrapping and stuff okay.. im more of the "oh its christmas again, what shall i do?" sort of person.. but i made an effort to like try and wrap it nicely.. (and no, im not known for my artistic abilities either) theirs was.. err, i shall not say.. anyways. i remember when i was younger i received this present which i cant even remember what it was, but the way it was wrapped had me positively thrilled. it was like a shirt, with the collar and the sleeves and all.. it was so cool, i remember it till now.. i dont even remember who gave it to me.. but anyways, when doing your christmas stuff this holidays, remember, a small effort goes a long way.. okay maybe in this case a lot of effort (believe me, i should know, from all my wrapping experience) goes a really long way..
10:18 pm
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
you. when you hold my hand, i cant help but wonder if im here helping or if im being helped instead.. when you clap your hands, i wonder if we're the ones making your day, or you making ours.. giving us a reaction so that we can cope with your sense of timelessness and peace.. when you give me one of those long stares of yours, im afraid to meet your eyes yet afraid to look away.. i do not understand the world as you see it, and neither can you understand mine.. but your silence talks to me in a way that the thousands of words i hear and speak each day never will.. and your smile, when you do smile, how it lights up your face.. renson.. dunno how i spell your name.. but anyways, when you took my hand and kissed it, i nearly died.. it was so sweet.. phyllis.. your sunny disposition and readiness to laugh are so refreshing, you have no idea how it made my day.. i find it hard not to wonder how long this will last.. will you still laugh and smile so easily after youve been here a few more months, a few more years? and to all the nameless people i met today, thank you. we dont know each other, but you have taught me lessons you yourself probably dont understand..
then again, maybe you do, in your own special way.. thank you.
9:34 pm
Sunday, December 03, 2006
battle against the bread
today i waged war. no, not against the family of lizards invading my house.. not against the huge pile of papers still lying on my table (much as my parents would love for that to happen), but against a lump of dough.. it all started with a breadmaker my mum bought some three years ago which has been sitting in a corner gathering dust.. the instructions are very simple. dump the required ingredients in, press the correct buttons, and voila! nice new bread. but then, the thing is, we couldnt even take out the baking tray thing, a bit hard to explain but there was something obviously wrong.. remember tbis name and dont ever buy stuff with this name: Giabo. Giabo Giabo Giabo. there, should be somewhat in your brain now.. well its in mine.. so we decided that we would just bake bread the good old fashioned way.. it started out as rather fun.. but then the instructions seemed to get longer and looooongerrr. like how i didnt realise that i have to do some stuff then wait for an hour, do some more stuff and wait for another hour.. i tell you, i will never look upon the humble loaf the same way again.. you can feel the warmth when youre kneading the dough.. and imagine all the yeast respiring anaerobically.. i think thats pretty darn cool. not to mention kinda gross-feeling, when you actually stop to think about it.. anyways, now its all done and i have two lovely loaves of bread just screaming: eat me! eat me! well, they look like bread.. they smell like bread.. but i guess the real test will come tomorrow morning come breakfast time.. i hope none of us die of food poisoning though.. that would mean the end of my bread making days. youve done cookies, youve done brownies, but have you done bread? hahaha.. i actually wanted to upload pics of the bread but then i realised that i didnt know how to. bleh :(
11:24 pm
Friday, December 01, 2006
you know what, if you have your principles and want to stick by them, thats fine by me.. in fact, its awesome. its cool that you actually have something you wanna live by. and yes, i can understand that the ideal life and the real life and somehow very different and sticking by what you believe in, or at least what you profess to believe in, can be a very difficult thing to do.. but come on, be reasonable. look, dont go round preaching what you cant reciprocate okay.. its just so hypocritical.. usually i wouldnt even say all this, but since you somehow got me started earlier, i guess i have to finish it.. its kinda awkard doing it face to face.. i dont want you to feel confronted or anything.. and since i know you do read this, oh well.. haha i hope you know that im talking to you, whoever you are.. anyways, if you can actually practise what you preach and really stick by these so called values (im not saying theyre not good. im just saying that maybe i dont believe in them anymore), i dont mind you telling me that i should/shouldnt do this or that. im perfectly okay with that. goodness knows, i need some kind of stimulus. but i cant stand it if you make it seem like youre such an angel when youre actually cutting corners and making excuses to yourself when doing so. dont preach to me what you yourself cant carry out.. its okay if youre still figuring out where you stand in this whole morality thing.. i dont mind talking if you want to, but please spare me the "i dont like it when you..." hey, im saying this because i consider you a good friend.. i hope youre not offended or anything.. if you are then thats just.. i dunno, i guess i shall stop here.
12:36 am
gail.
loves anything new
gets caught up in causes, events, loves
but doesn't do anything about them.
professes to be a supporter of the green movement
but leaves the lights on
disapproves of mcdonalds
but eats there anyways.
godwise, the jury's still out.
schoolwise, fass rocks my socks
but why do i have like a ton of work to do?
familywise, i guess theyre/its great
we just need to figure out what to do around each other?
freindswise, hey you guys are awesome.
blogwise, realises that the profile section is crappy
but doesn't know how else to fill up the space.