Sunday, December 17, 2006

well here i am, very much still alive.. it seems sometimes things seem worse than they actually are but oh well anyway.
the other day i was coming home, got on the bus, sat down as usual though not in my favourite seat.. and this guy opposite me gave me a little smile.. just a small upwards turn of the mouth, but the smile was in the eyes, and boy what a smile it was. it was the smile of somebody all too accustomed to the quick glance and lookaway of singaporeans, knowing thatll probably be all one could expect but still smiling anyway.. he had this little girl who was super cute.. she dropped her bottle near my feet and when she said sorry she even shook my hand.. hmm i tell you i prefer kids to older people.. or even people remotely near the same age as me.. children have this unassumingness about them.. and they dont expect much of you, taking all your oddities as well, not abnormalties but i dunno, as if its what theyve been expecting all along.. i guess thats the trouble with growing up.. the more you see of this world, the habit of the human intellect becomes more apparent.. our need for order in chaos, and the need to categorize spills over into how we see each other and well, so on.. but anyways, that totally made my day.. i practically skipped up the stairs leading to my house.. okay maybe not skipped, dashed or ran is a bit more realisitic.. i even managed a smile and a sort of half-wave from the bus stop to the guy and his kid, which on hindsight must have looked pretty retarded.. oh well, now you know how to make my day..
today we had this family lunch thingy which was sort of a pre-christmas kind of thing.. and since well i decided that i had better try to play the part of the dutiful daughter and all so that my parents wouldnt be forced to come up with some lame excuse explaining my abscence, i went along.. altogether not too painful, could have been worse i guess.. but i decided that i should be nicer to a few of my relatives..
1) auntie claudine.. the really nice one who always wraps the christmas presents nicely and well, with some effort put in.. and who actually puts some thought into what gifts to get.. but the problem is, shes kind of always busy working as some beautician something-or-other.. so, yeah well..
2) auntie josephine, the youngest daughter of my mums family.. shes a housewife, no correction, homemaker.. and feel kind of bad for her cos shes kind of lonely at home with her two kids for company the whole day.. her husband is a jap chef, how cool is that.. well, but not so cool for her though.. cooking must be up to standard.. yeah i feel like i should visit or something.. especially since i taught her daughter one of these last hols and we kinda talked a bit.. yeah..
3) my grandparents.. at the end when the other cousins left and there was just me and isabelle they were talking, no correction, clamouring to talk.. did you know that im the like the great-great-granddaughter of choo joo chiat, the person whom joo chiat road was named after..? pretty cool huh.. i didnt know which was sadder, them or me pretending that it was the most interesting conversation ive ever had in my life.. yeah, especially when a couple of days ago my grandmother was saying how i only went to visit when i forgot to bring along my house keys.. boo boo, me. yeh, so visit and sit around and talk sometime soon..
heh must be the whole christmas season thing, getting me in such a rambling mood.. can you believe it ive got carols humming themselves around my head even when nothing is playing.. stupid commercialization of christmas and all, everywhere i go i hear them..

Bonjour. Si vous voulons me chercher, vous êtes venu au faux endroit.

Sunday, December 17, 2006

9:59 pm

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