im not sure if anybody read the thingthing on saturday or sunday about SM Goh's speech at hougang buried in some corner of ST, but if somebody did, it might have raised some eyebrows and such.
excerpt which can also be found in ST: Amongst the things you can do, I suggest you study the annual accounts of the town council to ensure that the funds are properly used. Check whether the arrears for S & C charges are piling up, and eating into their reserves. Make sure that enough money is put aside for cyclical maintenance. In your walkabouts, check on the estate maintenance. If Mr Low has done a good job, give him credit for it. If there are deficiencies, point them out to the residents. In short, play the role of an effective opposition in Hougang.
my first reaction was like, huh? HUHH?! huh huh huhh??! why the huhs. the last i heard/read from various online sources, other town councils were the ones taking flak for their reserves. for having something in the region of tens of millions of dollars in their coffers. and investing quite a fair portion in less stable stuff like stocks. while increasing their S & C charges, even though they receive government grants. whereas if you compare this with the opposition wards, if im not wrong, hougangs charges went up by much less even though they dont receive the grants because apparently the grants are given out by some pap people? or at least, thats what i think is happening lah.
yeah so hence the big huhh. i mean, that is like seriously what on earth lah, i think. i thought the thing was about why the other town councils have so very much, not why hougang has so much less than them.. i dunno, sounds alot like trying to divert attention to me..
speech can be found here and partial ST article can be found here.
10:52 pm
Thursday, July 24, 2008
OMGOMGOMG, MADE IT FOR FRENCH 2!! omg, this totally made my day lah. omgomgomg. although well uhh, most made it for french 3, and quite a handful for french 5 but still.. omgomgomg. i thought i wouldnt make it at all.. YEAH YEAH YEAH. shucks this is too good to be true. better start mugging more french.
11:36 pm
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
wow david cook even has airtime on gold90 fm.
3:09 am
Thursday, July 17, 2008
omg, i am so so excited about school, i cant believe it. im like building a timetable with the online thingy for the third time, omg. school is going to be so fun.. its only a pity you have so little time you cant do everything. although, i suppose i might start whining somewhat when we have to read chim stuff with small words yeah.. but until then, omg im excited!
10:05 pm
Monday, July 14, 2008
"Let's not rule out organ trading yet, says Khaw"
anybody else get a feeling of whats gonna happen next?
11:45 pm
Sunday, July 13, 2008
my mother should win an award. like, seriously. something like.. i dunno. most emotionally draining person. or lets see. most petty adult. or hmm. miss personality. or something. and ill be there screaming and cheering the loudest when she receives it. ohmygod like seriously. grow up. or shut up. or both. yes both would be good. like whaaaaat the helllll. threatening to throw away my tomatoes (which i bought with my last couple of dollars). or taking my phone and probably wondered what to do with it in the middle of the night so returned it in the morning but not in the same location. come on lah. dont pretend youre doing me a favour by removing it from the floor can. i was charging it. like, whatever. id be really happy if we had a i dont disturb you you dont disturb me thing. that would be great, really. until im able to move out.
my mother is like, amazing, i tell you. do not, ever, show that you want/or need something. like something physical, or money, or a favour, or anything, really. because once she realises that then shell use that as a bargaining chip. listen to me, or else. do this, or else. case in point. the tomatoes. like hello? she knows im close to broke lah. she didnt throw them away in the end, thank goodness. case in point. getting lifts in school. until i kept on pointing out to her that she was being stupid. (didnt use that word though) besides, id rather be late for school or not go to school at all rather than giving you something else to prod me into doing what you want the next time. i guess hence the rather poor showing in school on some days heh. yes i think ignoring each other is a much better option.
11:47 am
okay. its off. shit shit shit. i feel.. quite retarded, really. earlier before knocking off she came by and actually tried making a joke of me biting my earphone cord. i was like... what on earth? the only conclusion i can come to is that she thought that me washing my clothes was a strange form of apology or something. right. and the sums really do not add up. i figure id need at least 1500 a month. it sounds so exorbitant lah but well. it really really would not work out, according to my so-far incomplete plan. darn. sometimes eyes just feel like they were made to be rolled at their owners.
but warning to future self: remember.
12:49 am
Saturday, July 12, 2008
okay world inferno friendship society did the job. must see them live one day. what are their chances of coming to singapore. starting to think that my bed sounds way better than the dirty floor. i suck lah.
11:46 pm
tireddd. the washing machine is taking damn long. just wanna unfurl the sleeping bag and try not to squint against the on-all-night light and fall asleep. how can one night be so nice and the next so.. umm, i dunno. unexpected. maybe a good dose of simple plan can cure this. will think of uni and the finance part of it tomorrow.
11:14 pm
okay, this is such a bad idea. so bad, i dont even know what to make of it. but i guess it seems like my childhood dreams just might be coming true after all. right now im waiting for the washing machine and the dryer, which would give me a coupla hours. and then after that.. im gone. i dunno, i didnt expect it to be so anti-climatic, really. this morning she was pissed. like from the moment i woke. not even the little one was spared. not that it would have made much of a difference. but oh well, whats new. but there was this period before i left the house where were actually had a civil conversation. for all of fifteen seconds. or thirty. felt like forever. in a nice way, i guess. but anyways. so i dunno what happened, then there i was being stubborn.. going for 12 hours incident-free and sorta being nice, even. that doesnt solve anything, you know that right.. yes i know its my fault, okay.. but every time i present you my case, you bulldoze right over it. using the best argument ever, after everything else fails. because i am THE MOTHER. i have the right to do as i see best for you and that is just how i make out that best to be. wow. awesome. thanks for being ever so receptive to feedback. and that is just so... i dunno. christian. because he is god. and thus follows varying attributes and sides of god, depending on the thing at hand. yay, hurray. *jumps for joy*
yeah so. haha. i guess between my sister and i, we displayed classic passive agressive behaviour. all teens do it, apparently. she was on the computer doing some apparently very important stuff that couldnt wait and would do the rice thing later. and uh, i was pretending to be very very interested in eating biscuits. so yeah well. it must be pretty hard to continue ranting when your most engaged audience is the table or the chair. or the wall, even. so well, she threw rachels pencil box at her head. it must really have hurt. her pencil box is metal, mind you. so well, had to be fair, right. she started trying to throw stuff in my direction too but i kinda was too far away for any direct hits. it biscuits i was holding got crushed though. i bet the sofas full of crumbs now. oh well. she hasnt used any violence for a very, very long time. a bit hard to do that, not when those in question are stronger (rachel) or bigger (me) than you are. i remember the very first time i hit back. words are more her weapons of choice, really. so i guess she must have been really mad. cant quite remember about what though. she was using one of those lousy hangers (maybe cos she was hanging clothes?) and it had started to unravel into this long wire and you know the physics thingy. force = distance x mass (???) so it got more painful and i kinda like hit her arm or something. i was surprised myself. she was too. we kinda stared at each other and.. it ended badly, i guess.
anyways. so i got up and wanted to go to my room. like, out of sight out of mind, not that it would really have worked. but then as i passed her i said "you think youre the only one who can throw things?" not a very smart thing to say heh. then she said "if you dont _____________(cant remember what goes in there) then you can leave the house now." or something to that effect. we kinda stared at each other awhile then.. i went to start packing. its super anti-climax, really. i suppose this things been dragging out for way too long. i knew i was gonna go, sooner or later. but not this soon, i guess. and not this sudden. it was stupid, really. to get lulled into a false sense of security. and the timings perfect too. i am so broke. i spent the last dollars on *drumroll* tomatoes. cos of that tomato sauce thing. oh well. money... can be earned. tonight its the hard floor for me. and the empty ceiling for company. the one time i walked out, i came back the next day. right. we all pretended nothing happened after that. must not happen again. we know whats gonna happen, right. not today, tomorrow. not tomorrow, next week. or next month. or year. bound to happen. reminds me of that simple plan song.
i dont wanna hurt you, you dont wanna hurt me we cant rearrange you can never change me so say goodbye, nothing i say could change your mind because i cant stay, tomorrow ill be on my way so dont expect to see me in my bed.... cos when you wake up, i wont be there.
can you imagine, after all these years. ha. feels like aeons ago, listening to this teenager stuff. and yet in some ways, like yesterday. come on world inferno friendship society. make me happy again. or dresden dolls. anybody.
anyways. theres just one thing i dunno what to do about. baths and piano and other creature comforts i can sneak back every day before isabelle gets back. but what about the uni thing. i tried calculating. with living expenses and all, it looks highly dubious that something will work out. not when im nearly literally penniless. a few months ago, yeah maybe. now, nuh uh. shucks. i dont wanna wait another yearrrrrrrrrr. :( how now, brown cow.
10:09 pm
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
id like to see what reply there is for this. not that ive finished reading it or anything..
11:18 pm
id like to see what response there is for this. not that ive finished reading it or anything..
11:18 pm
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
this has been a really... strange week family-wise. and the weeks just barely off to a start, isnt it. first off, isabelle. isabelle isabelle isabelle. amazing what i didnt notice in the month plus that ive been staying at home. as much as it is fascinating watching her sorta "grow up", it really does scare me. a bit. it struck me that we are so... different. but the same, sometimes? its like wow. the other day she asked me. do you know who is my form teachers pet in class? and i was like, uhhh. you? and she was like yeah, and all happy and beaming and proud. i was like ... right. awesome! the way she bosses her friends around? i sure dont remember having playmates like that. or wanting to, for that matter. her friends almost seem to want to be bossed, sometimes. and the way she sneaks and goes tattle taling, like its all of her business. right.. like that will make so much of a difference to my life manzzz. now that we no longer have full-time help, she does the spying on me. oh puh-lease. calling back to see if im at home? opening the door quietly then rushing into the room to see what i am doing? err like, what on earth? you hardly need to score points with Les Parents, right. sometimes i cant help but feel that she really is a sanctimonious little i-dunno-what but wth. not like getting annoyed will change my life. so wells, here i still am.. but when she does remember how to be a kid, yeah well, thats real nice.
anyways. rachel? she uhh, lets see. had her k2 race today. they thought theyd own nj, actually. but then the line-up changed, so well. but still, they made it to semis. and im PRETTY DARN PROUD OF HER okay. she is like the CANOEING GIRLS CAPTION can. haha omg, i sound like an over-enthusiastic parent. eww. anyways. i hope she does better than me in As. she certainly does deserve it.
and well, then theres the parents. i cant help but get the feeling that after nineteen years or so, theyve come to realise that the person that they helped shaped really didnt quite turn out as they expected. and theres this air of exasperation and perhaps, futility even? cos i mean, oh shucks, nineteen years, so fast? the most impressionable years, all gone? and not-quite-suddenly theres this human being we have to contend with? i mean, yeah i kinda sympathise but. i am who i am already. i suppose i could change but... never mind. lame excuses shouldnt see the light of day anyways. so well, with each new habit they deem undesirable, they come up with a new rule, a new guideline for the young one. i feel sad for her, really. wouldnt wanna be in her shoes. i wish theyd decide on a solid rule thingy and stick to it. not just whatever sticks their fancy, or whatever comes up. maybe then ill really try not to break them..
and then there was this evening. its my cousins birthday soon and i joined them for dinner cos i dunno, weve been talking quite a bit recently? what with his random dog-walking thing to our house and all.. yeah so well, we had egyptian food. i mean like. egyptian food?! who eats egyptian food. yeah well i suppose now i do.. and they have this water smoking thing that looks really interesting.. anyways, it was really interesting, not to mention funny, to watch another family how-to-say, interact with each other.. i must say though, theyre a really vocal family. they can talk over each other when theyve got something (however pointless) to say. and my cousins are somehow ingrained to have their own opinions and passions, which is nice.. i was kinda surprised at how similar my mum and my aunt were. the way they do things, their supposed roles in the family.. although at first glance they are so, so different. and i didnt know my uncle could be funny as well. oh wells. but thats not to say theyre an abnormal family though. there were the (is suppose) usual bickers and stuff.
oh right. now im getting the cold treatment from the mother. the talking to other people but actually talking to me kinda thing. huzzah.
10:28 pm
Monday, July 07, 2008
yeah i suppose maybe i should do more. but oh well. i suppose i really am apathetic, after all.
11:03 pm
just.. tell me what you want. if you dont wanna wash my clothes, fine. you dont want me to stay in your house, okay if you say so.. we'll set a date, ill get a job, whatever. you dont want to pay for my education, okay.. its your money after all. i mean, seriously. id love to start studying again in a months time, but if im gonna be threatened with the withdrawal of these whenever you want something of me then.. why do you do it in the first place?
i could prove you wrong, i suppose.. that i could do all that on my own.. but i cant be bothered to summon the required energy. i just cant be bothered. so much for childhood goals, eh?
10:52 pm
Thursday, July 03, 2008
NUS FASS.
1:23 am
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
so camp. now that im back from it and gotten a nice sleep and a nice shower. it was ALOT better than i expected. even though i realised halfway through that it was four-day and not three-day haha. i was like, errrrrr... oooooppppss. oh. one thing. i am hereby resolving never to roll my eyes at ntu's arts and engineering speed dating thing again because here at nus they have *drumroll* sp night. which stands for special partner. or secret pal. or something. whatever. it was damn funny lah. anyways. the people were great, super welfare. okay rarh im not going to say any more. my brains a bit fuzzed up. four days without any form of sarcasm. good thing i suppose. but anyways. came back to find the appeal letter waiting for me and i guess its...............
anyways. pedal point should meet up before anyone leaves.
8:14 am
gail.
loves anything new
gets caught up in causes, events, loves
but doesn't do anything about them.
professes to be a supporter of the green movement
but leaves the lights on
disapproves of mcdonalds
but eats there anyways.
godwise, the jury's still out.
schoolwise, fass rocks my socks
but why do i have like a ton of work to do?
familywise, i guess theyre/its great
we just need to figure out what to do around each other?
freindswise, hey you guys are awesome.
blogwise, realises that the profile section is crappy
but doesn't know how else to fill up the space.