Bonjour. Si vous voulons me chercher, vous êtes venu au faux endroit.
Monday, October 13, 2008
i guess you could say im making a mountain out of a molehill. but its hard not to feel like everything they say is a personal attack of some sort. over the years i have tried cold wars and.. somewhat lukewarm wars. silence, glaring daggers, just walking away, hiding in the room until they leave, pretending they didnt exist, pretending i didnt exist, retorting back, shouting back, saying what i think in a calm explanatory manner, turning everything they say good or bad into a joke, etc. not to mention trying so hard to be mummy/daddys girl when i was way younger. but its so darn unmotivating when all you hear each day are the same unsatisfactory things you do/are. there seems no point. can you really not find anything good or nice to say? sure i have many flaws. but the last time i checked you werent exactly flawless as well. i try to stay out of your way, dont come back so early, wash my own clothes so we dont even have to touch each others stuff, but you force yourself upon my things. yeah well its a nice gesture and all, but dont bloody complain about it if you wanna do it. theres a reason why i do things myself. okay so then i tried being nice. didnt say anything about you meddling.. took lifts from you in the hope of maybe some in-car bonding since we wouldnt be forced to talk to each other otherwise. tried small talk out of the car even. and yet you have nothing positive to say? okay maybe i did dash your hopes of raising a family thats well, closer to perfect. maybe im subverting all your qi wang by being such a non/under-achiever. look im sorry, okay? you have isabelle. and you have rachel. just.. stop comparing me to them. god. this is so pathetic. why do i even care. so much for apathy, huh.
12:26 am
gail.
loves anything new
gets caught up in causes, events, loves
but doesn't do anything about them.
professes to be a supporter of the green movement
but leaves the lights on
disapproves of mcdonalds
but eats there anyways.
godwise, the jury's still out.
schoolwise, fass rocks my socks
but why do i have like a ton of work to do?
familywise, i guess theyre/its great
we just need to figure out what to do around each other?
freindswise, hey you guys are awesome.
blogwise, realises that the profile section is crappy
but doesn't know how else to fill up the space.
